By Evan Ream
“I fell in love with football as I was later to fall in love with women: suddenly, inexplicably, uncritically, giving no thought to the pain or disruption it would bring with it.”
-Nick Hornby, Fever Pitch
It’s Wednesday night and Toronto FC, the worst team in the league, is playing Vancouver Whitecaps FC, a likely playoff team. Up 2-1, the fourth official announces that there will be four minutes of stoppage time. He is met with a chorus boos from U-Sector.
A harmless long ball is floated into the box from a Vancouver player. Toronto goalkeeper Milos Kocic will easily grab the ball, waste a few seconds and send it back into play; Kocic is an experienced goalkeeper, and this is an easy play.
The ball gets closer and closer and closer. Kocic jumps up, but out of nowhere, Whitecaps forward Darren Mattocks literally leaps over his defender and in front of Kocic, heading the ball into the empty net in an awe-inspiring feat of athleticism. Typical Toronto.
Mattocks sprints over to the supporters section and raises up both his hands and put them together, making a heart shape. Thirteen-dollar beers rain down on Mattocks who stands there, stoic, knowing that once again, the entire city of Toronto has been deflated because of their soccer team.